Life Don't Hold No Glamour Anymore

I was responding to my friend Alice who is on disability and has been in terrible pain since her knee surgery. Alice really could use some friends but I don't want to accidentally send trolls her way. If you would like to be a compassionate friend, email me at bloomingpsycho@gmail.com and if you are someone I trust, I will give you her blog URL. Alice is an intersexed person (someone born with both genders) and lives with depression and evidence of schizophrenia or a similar disorder. She was saying that she feels like it is her lot in life to be  alone and have no luck. I really feel very much the same way.

I don't know why good people have to have such bad luck. I'm not saying that I'm that good of a person but I don't think I'm that BAD of a person, and my luck is terrible. My son is a good person and he is very depressed. I think not having anything to cheer us, not having any money to have a little bit of a good time doesn't help, and certainly pain doesn't help. My pain levels aren't as bad as yours by any means, but I do have fibromyalgia and I walk with a bit of a "hitch in my git-along." My left foot turns out and I have sciatica. I hope things get better for you, that at least you won't be in so much pain.

I hate how we are told in this world that we have to be beautiful in a certain way to deserve anything good. LIES, ALL LIES! And yet I have bought in and swallowed the lie hook, line, and sinker.

You win, or at least I lose

This is just a copy of a note from my Facebook page. So shoot me for being too fucking lazy to edit it.

Folks, I cannot do this shit any more. I am tired of people fighting with each other. I try to show kindness and the response I get in return is meanness. I want to be supportive of others but I have been unfriended for doing so--by someone I considered a friend for a long time. This hurts really badly. Forgive me if I keep my distance. It only hurts more when you let people in.
My father is dying slowly and awfully. I live in a house with no running water. I can't afford to get a new place or to repair this one. I have mental problems. Excuse me for having feelings. Excuse me for hurting when people cut me off because I am too damaged. Excuse me for existing.
I will keep posting the animal rescue stuff but other than that I'm only going to play with my virtual aquarium. I'm sorry, but I cannot allow myself to open up and be hurt any more.

True Colors

Every experience I have with people just shows me more and more that you can't trust. People will eventually stick the knife in. I guess I should thank people when they show their true colors. I just don't know why there has to be so much hate and ugliness. We are all hurting. Shouldn't we be kind to one another?