The Wizard of Oz: Not a Good Matchmaker

On Beauty, Shallowness, and Romance

This is a response to a poignant, painful post by Shannon of the fabulous Fierce, Freethinking Fatties blog.

 I was never considered pretty even when I was thin. At this point in my life I do not seek romance because I have mental health issues that make it impossible. Borderline personality disorder and romantic attachment make a very poor combination. I can’t take care of myself when I’m hung up on some guy–invariably a jerk.

I wouldn’t want guys drooling over me and thinking of me as a “babe” and a “hottie.” I am a very modest person and uncomfortable with that sort of lecherousness. However, in spite of it all, just once I would like to be seen as attractive. I guess it affects us all.

Borderline Idealization and Devaluation in Relationships

Watch the video here.

I decided long ago that due to my condition attempting to have a romantic relationship was detrimental, and I have been better without one. What is discouraging is seeing the trouble in platonic relationships. I have a very hard time getting close to people.

 

For those who don't know me, please don't tell me how "sad" it is that I have "given up" on romance. I have been a lot less "sad" since having done so. And don't tell me how "unhealthy" it is to live without sex. I don't care about sex, and again, I have been a lot happier without it. These types of relationships have never been anything but negative and destructive for me. It does, however, bother me that I can't seem to have platonic friendships without some of the same troubles creeping in. Borderline personality disorder is very destructive to intimacy of any kind.