Right Wing Fundie Hypocrisy Rears its Ugly Head--Not Surprisingly

Right Wing fundamentalist Vanessa Anderson not only not surprisingly hates gays but advocates meanness towards plus size folk. Not only did Anderson decry Oprah Winfrey's beliefs that gay people should accept themselves as they are but she also joined in the "lulz" when one of her followers joked about "Oprah's fat ass."

That's Fundie Christian Love for you. Hate everybody who doesn't happen to subscribe to your belief system--or, apparently, to your ideals of what people should look like.

I do not know anything else about this person and I'm not sure how I got subscribed to her in the first place. All I know is that I find both her intolerance of gays and her belief that it's okay to laugh at larger people extremely offensive.

Bad Crazy Fatty

This is a response to a post at Living Life At 400 Pounds.

I have mental health issues, and just like there are supposed to be "good fatties" (the ones who are TRYING SO HARD to lose weight) and "bad fatties" (those who aren't TRYING SO HARD) there are also "good crazies" (the ones that have an OH SO POSITIVE attitude in spite of their mental illness) and "bad crazies" (the ones who admit to being depressed and angry) 

I guess I fall into the Bad Crazy and Not Particularly Good Fatty category. A lot of the time I feel that being mentally ill is just plain shit, and no, the Magic Medicines don't work to turn me into a Stepford Crazy. Most of them literally make me psychotic, which I normally am not.

I have actually had people say to me that if I "just let Jesus into my life" than my mental illness would be cured. Really. I guess that's why there are no mentally ill Christians. Why didn't I think of it sooner?

It's Time to Stop Accepting Heavy Hatred

Ragen Chastain wrote a post on her blog about a study which shows that plus size women prefer to see slender models in advertising for plus size clothing. Plus size clothiers such as Lane Bryant argue that this is why they use slender models in their ads. Both Ragen and I are in agreement that this "logic" is flawed at best and, in fact, hateful.

Here is my response.

I think the results of this study reflect what large women have been conditioned to believe. It is like the study done years ago which showed that black children preferred white baby dolls. This is, of course, because the black children had been conditioned to believe that white skin was more attractive than black skin.

To say that because plus size women prefer to look at slender models in advertising and therefore slender models are better would be akin to saying that black children preferred white baby dolls because white skin is better. In this decade there are very few people who would accept the validity of this argument. Yet many accept wholesale the validity of the argument that slender models are superior. Very sad.

Psycho: Naked???

This was a response to a letter that a photographer friend of mine, Walt Cessna, received. You can also discover more about Walt on his blog.

It's a wonderful photo, and I was struck by the words in the letter too. People probably find it hard to believe, but I used to model for art schools, and no, I was never hot or sexy. I had a kangaroo pouch belly with stretch marks, my butt and thighs are large, and my boobs are average sized and never enhanced. I have never done erotic modeling--who the hell would want to see a 45 year old fat woman with gray hair doing anything erotic--but I honestly have no problems with the idea of nude modeling. We are born naked, ain't we?

I wish that people would have a more natural attitude about our bodies. Fat or thin, old or young, we all have a certain beauty. 

I think that's what I really like about your work. It's natural, never forced. Kudos!

Shit Counselors Who Need to be Hog-Tied

If you want to make your blood boil, read this appalling account by a woman with PTSD and other issues who happens to be overweight as well. This poor individual was brutally psychologically abused by her so-called therapist. 

This was my response to her post:

Personally I don't trust counselors because I've had bad experiences with many of them, but this one took the cake. Back in 1997 I was raped by a former boyfriend and was having panic attacks. I went to a counselor who also did hypnotherapy and supposedly did EMDR, but a counselor I had later said he never heard of EMDR being performed in the manner I described. At any rate at one point in my treatment, this broad says to me "Well, Bloomy, you're doing much better. You were a real basket case when you first came here." I looked at her aghast and said "EXCUSE ME?" 

She hemmed and hawed and said "well, what I meant was...well, you're doing much better now."

I said that I agreed that I was, and it was never appropriate to refer to a client as a "basket case." I terminated my therapy with her. Unfortunately I was apologetic about doing so. She said "oh, you don't need to apologize. I'M not the one with the self-esteem problem."

I agree with the person who said that it is worth it to interview potential therapists. You don't owe them a damn thing if they can't deliver compassionate treatment!

On Beauty, Shallowness, and Romance

This is a response to a poignant, painful post by Shannon of the fabulous Fierce, Freethinking Fatties blog.

 I was never considered pretty even when I was thin. At this point in my life I do not seek romance because I have mental health issues that make it impossible. Borderline personality disorder and romantic attachment make a very poor combination. I can’t take care of myself when I’m hung up on some guy–invariably a jerk.

I wouldn’t want guys drooling over me and thinking of me as a “babe” and a “hottie.” I am a very modest person and uncomfortable with that sort of lecherousness. However, in spite of it all, just once I would like to be seen as attractive. I guess it affects us all.